I’m not doing two dot-posts in a row, although this is going to be a dot-post without the dots. It’s been a disjointed kind of weekend.

Curse you, May 10th. So many things are happening in St. Louis that weekend, and I keep saying no because we’ll be going to my hometown for Mother’s Day. But now there’s an offer I can’t refuse on behalf of my daughter. Dan Zanes, who she loves like I love Wilco, will finally be coming to St. Louis. Today, I figure out a way to take her to see him while spending the weekend in my hometown. Got a cloner I can borrow? No longer an issue, as both shows are already sold out, goddammit. I should check these things before I go on crazy wild goose chases to make plans.

Speaking of Clara Jane, why won’t she sleep later than 7 AM? This is getting quite old. This weekend has, blessedly, been somewhat more peaceful than the rest of the week has been. We were at the bookstore on Friday, and she was acting like one of the apocalypse horsemen. While I issued orders through gritted teeth, one of the sweet storytime ladies patted me on the shoulder and said, “You are so patient with her.” I said, “Thank you, but I don’t feel very patient right now.” I guess the fact that my behavior appears patient is more important than the fact that I can feel my brain melting from the white heat of the impatience that dwells within me. Perhaps I’m doing something right.

Then again, I’ve felt like hell all weekend. I think I have repressed impatience poisoning.

Yesterday I watched that episode of Oprah about puppy mills. Oh my God. I’m not stranger to the world of puppy mills and their ramifications. My little smiley Murphy is the product of a puppy mill, rescued in a raid. My parents have a yellow Lab they rescued from an Amish “breeder” not dissimilar from the ones investigated on the show. Now, you’d be hard-pressed to find me spouting from the Church of Oprah. I record the show every day and might watch one episode of every ten, if it’s a subject that I think is important, like this one. Sobbing, I was. Sobbing and hugging my poor little puppy mill rescued Murphy. Today, I’m going to make dog biscuits and cat toys until my fingers bleed to raise money for the Greater Akron Humane Society. Order some. If you don’t want to order, go watch some of that damn Oprah footage. It’ll change your mind.

Why isn’t my child wearing clothes? Why have I consumed nothing but coffee and cookies today? Why is everything happening on May 10th? I have so many questions that will never be answered.