Poppy Mom

Words of wisdom from B.

My husband, B., has had a couple of moments of sheer brilliance today.

First, he has devised a new diet. The Bong Diet. No, it's not what you think. Using that kind of bong tends to lead to weight gain, particularly gained via Nutter Butters and Orange Crush consumed during a fit of The Munchies.

B.'s Bong Diet involves bonging a quart of water, a la a beer bong, before each meal.

Hm. Makes about as much sense as Atkins, and it's probably healthier.

B's second moment of brilliance occured during a visit from Clara "All Bacon, All the Time" Jane's weekly visit from her admiring 8-year-old neighbor, Boy. Boy came in and played with his best gal, then returned to the back yard with the hounds.

Five minutes later, I heard hammering. No biggie. Boy's father has been doing some work on the house. Then the hammering grew louder. And closer. And the living room wall began to shake.

B. went to the backdoor to see what the racket was about, and was promptly admonished by Boy for not answering the door quickly enough.

So, we had Round II of playtime. When Boy decided to leave, B. walked him to the backdoor so he could lock it. Trust me, we've learned to lock the doors when Boy's afoot. He believes in the "Su Casa Es Mi Casa" school of neighboring. We don't.

"Why are you coming with me?" Boy asked B.
"To lock the door behind you."
"Why?"
"Oh, just to be safe."
"You don't need to lock the door."
"Yes we do, Boy. Ooooooooh, yes, we do."

I married B. for his brains, you know.

Posted by Robin at August 18, 2004 08:53 PM | TrackBack