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January 10, 2006
Things That Need to Come to a Grinding Halt
- The use of the suffix "-palooza" to describe an extravagance of any sort. The straw that broke this particular camel's back: an episode of America's Test Kitchen that aired today, entitled Porkapalooza. We've officially reached the saturation point. Thank you.
-Adults partaking in baby talk in any of its myriad forms.
-January. I fucking hate January.
-B.'s belief that patented magic faeries come through the house and pick up his shit.
-Shit in general. When one has to cut one's fingernail because it has become filled with toddler shit, it's time to JUST STOP ALREADY.
-My urge to ever share a negative emotion or bad day with anyone, as I might as well be talking to myself when I do so. As of the end of this message, I will cease expressing any ugly feelings. From here on out, it's just Mary Motherfucking Sunshine, all day, everyday.
Beginning ... now.
Posted by Robin at January 10, 2006 04:35 PM
Comments
But sweetie, that's why I read your blog. Because it's not Mary Motherfucking Sunshine all the time. Because Mary Motherfucking Sunshine is one tiresome bitch.
Please come back, we love you so...
Posted by: Lisa (Blah Blah) at January 10, 2006 05:35 PM
Sell the patent for the magic faeries and retire to the Bahamas with a nanny and some serious tequila.
Posted by: Moose at January 11, 2006 12:57 AM
Please don't stop revealing your true feelings. It's refreshing to read your funny blogs, especially after a crappy day like today. By the way, your hubby's not the only one who believes the house cleans itself.
Posted by: Julie at January 11, 2006 02:58 AM
Amen on every single count!
Posted by: Karen Rani at January 11, 2006 09:24 AM
although, Porkapalooza does sound "interesting."
Posted by: tpon at January 11, 2006 11:08 AM
Porkapalooza? Hee.
I have an addition to the list: the descriptive phrase "asian flair."
Cooking with Asian flair!
Decorating with Asian flair!
Makes me want to kick some ass...with Asian flair!
Posted by: Summer at January 11, 2006 12:35 PM
Funny. Speaking of grinding halt, Porkapalooza was my prom theme...
Ha! Ha! HA HA HA HA!!!!
Here's hoping today is a better one for you.
Posted by: Angie at January 11, 2006 12:45 PM
Poor love. They're flogging Porkapalooza on TV when you're having to live in Poopapalooza.
Just be. Sunshine or not, just be. We love you regardless.
Posted by: DixiePeach at January 11, 2006 02:28 PM
R also shares the faerie thing. Maybe it's a man thing. I feel you my love. I hate January too.
Sal x
Posted by: Sal at January 11, 2006 04:20 PM
All men think faeries clean up after them when they're not around. They must teach them this in preschool. They also believe that we move things all the damn time so they constantly ask us where things are, WITHOUT EVEN LOOKING IN THE PLACE THEY USUALLY ARE. What is with that? Sheesh. The washcloths are in the linen closet JUST AS THEY ALWAYS HAVE BEEN. I did not start suddenly storing the washcloths in the coffee cup cupboard.
I also fucking hate January. It's cold and gray and a downer after all the holiday cheer.
I agree with Lisa -- Mary Fucking Sunshine is a pain-in-the-ass. Don't grin and brave it out -- keep on sharing all your deepest feelings because that is without-a-doubt what endears you so much to all of us! You are very real and I adore you for it.
Posted by: Bluecat at January 11, 2006 10:29 PM
Men all have that gene. My "currently resting" househusband has not DONE A TAP around this place and I am going to commit matricide.
Yesterday's gems included:
- calling me during a meeting to ask me where A's hat was
- forgetting to be at home when the online supermarket order was delivered
- standing in my way whilst I cleaned the kitchen at the end of a ten hour day
But then, if I wanted someone like me, I'd be a lesbian.
Posted by: Zoe at January 12, 2006 01:52 PM
