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February 26, 2006
Definitely Not Mashed Potato Time
A year ago this week my dad underwent quadriple heart bypass surgery. That, along with a hard-to-diagnose form of arthritis led to his early retirement.
We were all concerned with how Dad would handle retired life, since he'd spent the previous 55.5 years of his life fulfilling the role of Crazy Workaholic Man. As I write, the Bobby Bare Jr.-Buck Owens-Jeff Tweedy-Radney Foster cover of "Take This Job and Shove It" just came on the shuffle. Because the shuffle, it knows. Anyway ...
Dad's adjusted well. He's entrenched himself in Lexi and Bubba, his quarter horses who are going to become parents in the next few weeks. He got Bubba trained to pull a cart and had a few wrecks. Nevermind that trying decapitate his dog Chiggar with a chainsaw is damn near a full-time job.
He's also discovered a new hobby. In my 33 years I don't think I've ever seen my dad read anything beyond the local newspaper and maybe the occasional horse or Nascar-related magazine. But hallelujah, my father has become a reader. At nearly 57 years of age, he recently procured his first library card. He's reading an average of two books a week. Now, I've always been a reader, but I'm lucky if I can finish one book every two weeks.
It was an odd sight when we were visiting my folks last weekend, seeing my dad in his armchair for hours, the TV silent - silent, for God's sake! That never happens! - with his nose in a book. "Hey Rob! You've gotta read this part!" he kept telling me, shoving his book at me. So I read numerous passages out of his book, things that he found funny or interesting, all while wondering, "Who are you and what have you done with my daddy?"
Yesterday afternoon I was on the phone with my mom. She told me that Dad's really enjoying his current book, Gap Creek by Robert Morgan, have I read it? No, I haven't.
I heard my dad in the background, yelling to my mom, "You've gotta read this part to her! Here! Read this page to her!" So, I had a little story time over the phone with my mom, at my dad's insistance.
I've got to say, after five minutes of my mom reading me the terrific details of a little boy vomiting great bucketsful of wriggly white worms, people reaching into his throat to pull them out until he fucking died, I came to the conclusion that I liked my dad better before he became a reader.
Fast forward to dinner tonight...
I made a lovely dinner, after a weekend of IHOP and Moe's. A spicy glazed pork tenderloin, sugar-glazed roasted carrots and mashed potatoes. We believe in the power of carbs in this house, oh yes we do. I didn't expect Clara Jane to eat any potatoes, because my child is completely unamerican and has never, ever liked mashed potatoes. I'm sure this is why I hear little clicking noises every time I'm on the phone. She's tried them a few times, but seems to have issues with the texture. Often, if she finds herself with a mouthful of mashed potatoes, she'll just sit there, mouth agape, potatoes blending with saliva under her tongue, dripping down her chin in a buttery river of drool.
But tonight, armed with a pair of chopsticks, she ate mashed potatoes. Teeny-tiny little dots on mashed potatoes on the end of her chopstick, enough to get that potatoey goodness without feeling like she has a mouthful of paste. Well, except for one bite, when she got a little carried away and found herself with the big drooly mashed potato river.
She stood there, mouth open, eyes horrified, chomping my fingers as I reached into her mouth to remove the offending potatoes, I realized you really can learn a lot from books.
Posted by Robin at February 26, 2006 07:15 PM
Comments
I'm so glad your Daddy is feeling better. I wish my Daddy would read more. Gap Creek is a GREAT book and just remember taking from it that life was HARD back then and the author wrote with such clarity about the chores and the strength it took to do them all. Then I thought: I would have surely only lasted a week back then!
Posted by: mommyontheverge at February 26, 2006 10:43 PM
It's a strange thing when you realize your parents are getting older. I drove my mom to the airport on Sunday. She would NEVER have asked me, but at about 2:00 I realized it was raining, and she was going to have to park in long term parking and slog through the rain, and I called her and said, "Mom, let me drive you to the airport." She argued with me at first, and then I said, "Mom, when you came over to Chip's (brother) yesterday, you looked tired, and I'm feeling tired, so I'm sure you're about my tired cubed -- so let me drive you. I will feel better." And she let me. She was flying to Los Angeles to take three days of depositions in one of her cases, which is typical. She travels a lot. But, when I dropped her at the airport, and it was pouring rain, and she tried to come help me with the luggage, I told her to get under the overhang, and I would take care of the luggage. And when I was closing the trunk and bringing her luggage toward her, I realized how small she looked to me, and how much she reminded me of her mom when her mom started to look elderly, and I just wanted to envelope her and protect her forever. And I realized that we've reached a different phase in our relationship. And while I'm not sure that I'm comfortable with it just yet, I do know that I would do absolutely anything to protect this woman that means so very very much to me. I can't even describe the amount of love I have for her. And it makes me so sad, because I realize that the next step is not going to be pleasant, but I also realize that this is the cycle of life, and we are so fortunate that our whole family lives within a few miles of one another, and I'm so blessed to have such a loving, caring family. I remember being 12 and wishing she were dead -- and I realize that was a typical 12-year-old thing, but now, I let her know how amazing I think she is, and how I'm only a successful person because of her and my dad, and that I wouldn't trade them for the world, no matter the rough times. I'm feeling pretty damn grateful these days.
Posted by: Jessica at March 1, 2006 01:26 AM
