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October 13, 2006

Friday Shuffle - The Domesticity Doldrums Edition

I am the very model of a modern major housefrau today.

We've fallen into a regular routine somewhere along the way at my house, and I'm not sure how it happened. Every Friday morning Clara Jane and I wake up, eat breakfast, and putter around the house all day. We sit on the couch and read piles of books. Between readings, she watches more TV than I should allow while I clean. As I sit here at 2:30 PM, I have washed, folded, and put away three loads of laundry. I've emptied and loaded the dishwasher. I've stripped the bed and will put clean sheets on it shortly. I've made breakfast, lunch, and a mid-morning snack. I've even listed some more jam on Etsy, and I'm taking a break from making up a recipe for parmesan-walnut shortbread crackers to go with my basil jelly.

For the past month or two, when anyone asks me what I'm up to or how I'm doing on a Friday, my knee-jerk reaction is to answer with the number of loads of laundry I've completed.

This morning I thought I'd break the cycle. We would go to the bookstore for storytime and coffee, and then make a stop at Whole Foods.

I took a shower and got dressed, then promptly got undressed and got back into my pajamas. I just couldn't come up with a good reason to go to all that work outside the house. Going out sounded exhausting, but for some reason, making six trips up and down the basement stairs to do laundry sounded leisurely. So we stayed home.

I had a moment today where I thought about how much I'd accomplished this morning, and I felt pretty good about it. I think I even had the, "This housewife business ain't too bad, moment" and then I smacked myself across the face for even thinking the word "housewife". I don't like its replacement "SAHM", either.

But now I'm tired. I've accomplished a lot, but nothing too terribly taxing or challenging. I'd love to park my butt on the couch, watch last night's "Ugly Betty" and maybe play with my much-neglected knitting, but I'm having a hard time allowing myself to do that.

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Nothing big, just a follow-up from the Summer of Anxiety, which has blessedly ended. Basically, I showed up at the doctor's office and said, "I'm good. Thanks!" And let me preface this by saying that I adore my doctor. She's the best. It was truly a miracle that I walked in her door six years ago. One of the things I love about her is that she acts like I'm one of her kids. She's frank but caring. Anytime I have an appointment, after we deal with the medical stuff she always asks how my life's going. She asks how I'm liking motherhood, how my writing's progressing (my manuscript is currently lying on the passenger side floorboard of my truck; it makes an excellent foot rest), etc.

Yesterday, she asked, "What are you doing for work these days?" I told her that, actually, I've started this new venture on Etsy. Much like when she first learned that I'd started catering four and a half years ago, she started giving me business leads: make foodie gift baskets and get the hospitals to sell them in the gift shops! Solicit to doctors, because they give little gifts to each other as thanks for referrals! Go to the drug companies and get the drug reps to buy jelly - they're always trying to bride doctors with goodies! I appreciate this, if for no other reason than it's cool to have someone who isn't legally obligated by the laws of marriage, family, or friendship get so excited and enthusiastic about the stuff I'm doing.

Then I mentioned my writing, and that I'm taking a break from my manuscript. This is where I started getting a little annoyed: she started badgering - yes, it finally reached the point where her suggestions began to feel overbearing - to pitch stories to all the local magazines. I tried to tell her, "I know how to pitch articles. I know which magazines are written in-house and which ones buy freelance. Thanks. I'm not interested," but she flat-out wouldn't listen. So I smiled and nodded, letting her have her say. She listens when I complain about my ovaries and my brain, which is what I'm paying her to do. I'm not paying her to listen to my career issues, so I'm not going to complain if she doesn't listen to them. I just dealt with this like I would any unsolicited advice: smile and nod, and proceed as I intended to all along.

I'm past the point of caring what others think about my life and how I should live it. If I'm currently happy hanging out in my pajamas and doing laundry all day, so be it. Tomorrow, I'll be up to my elbows in making homemade apple crip kits to sell. Next week, I'll be on a plane by myself, going to see Kristina, Wilco, and Revolution Rock: The Story of The Clash on its opening day at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I'll be running on no sleep while throwing myself at the feet of Mick Jones.

I'm not just a housewife. I'm not just ... anything. I'm continually amazed at the diversity of my life. It's almost as eclectic as my shuffles:

1. I Took Your Name - REM
2. The World Exploded Into Love - Bob Schneider
3. Chickamauga - Uncle Tupelo
4. You've Got a Friend - Carole King
5. New Slang - The Shins
6. They Never Got You - Spoon
7. Crash and Burn - Sheryl Crow
8. Well Done - The Donnas
9. Happy - Rolling Stones
10. Redemption Song - Wyclef Jean

Posted by Robin at October 13, 2006 02:18 PM

Comments

I finally got my first Uncle Tupelo album -- Anodyne -- can't wait to listen to it. I love Redemption Song.

I envy your life right now.

Posted by: Katya at October 13, 2006 03:53 PM

We once went to Chickamauga to see the civil war battlefield, and I sang that song the whole. way. there.

I also regularly cue up "The Long Cut" whenever my husband screws up on driving directions, tee hee.

Let's stick with hausfrau. That sounds pretty awesome. I'm glad you're okay with you. Seriously. That's so rad.

Squeeing! about your trip. Have so much fun! It feels so luxurious to slip into non-Mommy mode sometimes, doesn't it?

Posted by: michelle/weaker vessel at October 13, 2006 04:32 PM

I'll agree that Hausfrau sounds good 'cause that's what I get called.

I'll call you multifaceted, like a diamond. Shine on.

Posted by: Dixie at October 13, 2006 05:42 PM

Multifaceted sparkling diamond sounds good!

And I have a request/suggestion for your Etsy Biz which I will absolutely not be hurt if you don't want to pursue. :) I am allergic to apples and to apple pectin. I know of many other people who are as well -- and it makes buying things like preserves and hard candy really really difficult for me. I know I *could* mail order plum or pear pectin and break out Mom's old cookbooks and give it a whirl, but cooking is NOT my talent. I am fairly sure, if you wanted to offer a line of preserves using other pectins than apple, you'd have no trouble selling them. *I* certainly would buy them!

And when my budget straightens up a bit I'll be ordering from you for Christmas/Yule gifts. :)

Posted by: Coyote Lill at October 13, 2006 06:14 PM

i wanna see wilco. i'm green. as green as your background. maybe even greener.

can we come up with a cool word? housewife and sahm ain't cutting it here, either. think, think, think....

Posted by: kara joy at October 14, 2006 02:44 PM