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February 28, 2007
A Foul Mood to Entertain Us All
There's a reason why I need to make sure I take my Prozac on time, every single day. I normally take it first thing in the morning, but since I forgot to pick up my refill last night, I didn't get my dose until after three this afternoon.
I'm so damn crabby right now that, if blended with some garlic, mayo and panko and lightly fried in butter, I'd be one fine and tasty crabcake. I'd probably be flaming mad about the grease burns and being suffocated in mayo and whatnot, but that's beside the point.
I completely blame my mood on my neglect on the drug front, because it makes no sense that these things are bothering me:
- It's a lovely 63 degrees outside. I would love nothing more than to lie on my couch and rot what remains of my brain with last night's recorded "American Idol". To fully enjoy this, I need for my stupid dogs to be outside. If the dogs are inside during "Idol", they howl along with the shitty singers and totally ruin the experience for me. The dogs refuse to go outside. If it was 20 degrees outside, they would pacing the floors, whining and making me nuts to go outside. Not today. You know, I like to toying around on MySpace because 1) I'm a loser at heart, and 2) I like filling out surveys and memes, but I'm ashamed to do them on my blog. Quite often the question "Have you ever been in a fight with your pet?" appears on such surveys. What a stupid question! However, if these fucking dogs do not remove themselves from my house soon, Fight Club might possibly commence. I don't want to be the person who punches a Basset hound in the neck. I really don't.
- Speaking of pets, someone from the great state of Alabama came to my blog today by doing a search for "free pron (sic on their part) made from home of people having sex with pets". Add this to the person in Alabama who recently told me I was inviting Satan to take my child and I have to wonder if Katya, Michelle and my blogless pal Deb are the only people in that state who aren't loons. I know they're not, and I've probably insulted any other fine Alabama readers of this blog who aren't loons. For that, I'm sorry. Perhpas the Satan-fearing lady and the pet-fucker should hook up.
- I'm so annoyed with myself that I'm irritated with my dogs because I want to watch "American Idol". Honestly. If that isn't a sign of undermedication, nothing is.
- I can't seem to stop destroying the sock I'm trying to knit.
- I am so completely, utterly fed up with what passes for "news". Looking at CNN.com right now, the top story is breaking news from the Bahamas regarding the burial of Anna Nicole Smith. There are also headlines about a laughing young woman robbing a bank (Britney?), Robert Blake appealing some case about the murder of his wife, a judge doing a cartwheel in the courtroom because someone stayed sober, and an abandoned tiger and monkey who have become friends. HOLY SHIT! SOMEONE NEEDS TO CALL CNN, BECAUSE THOSE IDIOTS HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT WE'RE IN A WAR! They also seem to have forgotten that Britney Spears is in rehab, because hello?! Not one single headline about that.
Okay, it makes total sense to be pissed off about one. News agencies won't show the coffins of soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan, but this other shit passes for news? Please.
Oh, but let me tell you my real irritation today. I went to a new coffeehouse. Why? Why in the world would I do such a thing?
You know I've recently rekindled my adoration of Hartford Coffee (whose webpage has been having problems of late, otherwise I'd link). Fair trade, organic, perfect coffee. Yummy food. Local artists and music. Huge play area for the kiddos, which is generally populated with smart, funny, interesting parents. Great staff. It's my idea of nirvana. But I just had to go check out the new competing "kid's cafe" this morning, didn't I?
Oh my sweet Lord.
White. Everything's white. Or black. Except for the few plastic toys and the two wall-mounted plasma TVs. The two staff members I encountered were great. Friendly, and the sweet pink-haired girl who made my latte gave me the kind of apologetic smile that all but said, "I'm so sorry my chubby, dual-pigtailed, red lipsticked, wedge heeled Mary Jane wearing, knitting compadre. You are not going to be in your element in this joint. Just like me. Wanna go over to the boutique side of the shop, crawl under a $2000 crib, and we can hold each other while we cry?"
After about five minutes, I would have loved nothing more. I don't want to bad-mouth the other patrons. I really don't, because I hate all of this "mommy war" bullshit.
But is it really bullshit? Sometimes, I think not.
Clara Jane took off to the play area while I settled myself at a table, alone, with my latte and knitting. Now, whenever I do this at Hartford, I can guarantee that within five minutes, I'll be visiting with someone. Or at least have been acknowledged by someone other than staff. At the new place, all I encountered were dirty looks.
When I looked up to see a perfectly made-up mother making a tsk-tsk face at Clara Jane, then smoothing my child's rumbled bed-head, I knew it was time to go.
I'm not proud of this, but shortly after the hair-smoothing, Clara Jane came to me and told me she was hungry. I lied, told her the new coffeehouse didn't serve food, and made a hasty retreat to my beloved haunt, where I threw myself at the manager's feet and apologized for my transgression.
And then we hung out for two hours. Clara Jane filled up on hummus, carrots, and strawberry smoothie, then played. I spent the time doing what I do best: drinking coffee, eating hummus, screwing up the sock I'm knitting, and talking to six people I'd never met before. I now know them and their children by their names, and two of them have my name, email address, phone number and URL. Hello Karen and Christy, if you're reading.
I caught myself being bothered by the cliquishness of the moms at the new place. But then I go to Hartford, and it has its own cliquishness. The difference is, I'm a part of the clique. Of course, the other difference is, the "clique" basically consists of 90% of the people who frequent the joint. But I've done my fair share of making fun of the Yuppie types at the new coffeehouse with my like-minded Hartfordites.
Is this bad? I don't know. One of the things I love about Hartford is that I know that just about any time I'm there, I'm going to find like-minded people. At the new coffeehouse, not so like-minded. Good for them. They've found their place, and I have mine. Although those like-minded Hartford folks might shun me now that I've admitted I'd like to start a fight with my dogs so I can watch "American Idol". And then where will I go?
Posted by Robin at February 28, 2007 03:49 PM
Comments
Well at least you didn't want to punch anyone in the neck at the new coffee place. Or at least you resisted punching anyone in the neck.
Hey. You've found your place. That's a good thing. And if the snobs stay at the new coffee place then they won't be crawling over to yours and screwing up the general good vibe.
What in the world are you doing to that sock?
Posted by: Dixie at February 28, 2007 05:05 PM
Where will you go? Why, you'll come to Illinois, of course, home of the friendliest coffee-drinking Dog Fighters in the world.
(All this, *and* we claim Obama and Lincoln. We rule.)
Posted by: Summer at February 28, 2007 05:54 PM
joke 'em if they can't take a fuck.
Posted by: liz at February 28, 2007 06:24 PM
Hope you're feeling better and haven't been made into a crabcake. Mmmm...crabcake.
Speaking of crabs, Drew's having some issues with medication which is what is making him be such a prat. Got into another stupid fight last night while out walking the dog and he ended up sleeping on the couch. Did you hear me screaming in my head last night? Things are okay today though.
Posted by: Exena at February 28, 2007 06:35 PM
I don't think I'd mind being smothered in mayonnaise.
I love that description of you! You sound like someone I would like to hang out with! Oh wait...we have the Bat Signal.
Posted by: allison at February 28, 2007 06:44 PM
I want to hang out at hartford. But I don't drink coffee or knit. Would that be bad? Plus my 2 almost always have rumble tumble bedhead. Comes with the curls!!
Posted by: Andrea at March 1, 2007 12:56 PM
I think going back to your old coffee shop was smart; I can't figure out what Clara Jane had to play with at the new one. But you wouldn't have known you wouldn't like it if you hadn't gone, so good for you for being adventurous -- I'm not. I even order the same sugarfree, skim milk vanilla latte every time I go to my same coffee shop. They don't even have to ask.
Posted by: Katya at March 1, 2007 12:58 PM
Dixie, oh, I wanted to punch people in the neck at the new coffee place. I wanted to in a big, big way. As for the socks, I'm mangling them. I think I got cocky and thought I could do the gussets at knitting group and the coffeehouse, when I spend more time gabbing than knitting. I think it's been recovered. I was working on it at my doc appointment today and the doc, a fellow knitter, fawned over it.
Summer, Obama was one of my reasons for moving to Illinois. I was hoping he'd wait until 2012 to run for prez, just so I could selfishly have him represent me a little while longer.
Liz, I snorted. Really. I did.
Exena, I hope all's better with your cranky, crabby man. Let me know what's up.
Allison, are you talking about the description of my general appearence, or the description of myself as crabcake?
Andrea, you'd totally fit in at Hartford. You can do tea, soda, smoothies, even milkshakes if you don't like coffee. The food's really good, too. And they'll love your bed-headed babies! Drop me a line if you want to meet there sometime. I'd love to see you again.
Katya, I could use a bit less adventurous nature. I tend towards being short attention spanned, even if I love something, or a place. Clara Jane did have a good time at the new coffeehouse. To their credit, they had some great wooden blocks and she had fun building stuff for the short time we were there. As for my beverage of choice, at Hartford I'm easy - the $3 endless cup of coffee, and I'll drink anywhere from 3-6 big latte mugs. Black. Preferrably their High Octane super-caffienated blend. Although yesterday I got a little freaky and went for the flavored variety (Bavarian Chocolate) with milk and Splenda for a faux mocha.
Posted by: Robin at March 1, 2007 02:22 PM
Now see, the bedhead. I guess I wouldn't be the yuppy mommy coffeehouse type either since my boys seem to be the only kids in their preschool class with bedhead. I do comb their hair, it just doesn't make any difference, and I absolutely REFUSE to use "Product" on a three year old. I also let them pick out their own clothes and dress themselves if they feel like it, so generally, their clothes don't match and at least one item is on backwards on each of them. They're bringing grunge back.
Posted by: Monica at March 3, 2007 06:26 AM
Hey girl. I'm trying out the new cafe despite the warning. Why? Because I'm stupid. Also because Hartford has about 3,000 people in it on Sunday morning. I figure all the Stepford Mommies have to be in church pretending to be nice people, so I should have it to myself. We'll see.
Posted by: Beqi at March 4, 2007 10:14 AM
