<

My poor diabetic uncle had to go home for an extra insulin shot and a nap. The rest of us, in our sugar frenzy, went out and slaughtered wild animals to eat with our bare hands because our blood sugar levels were so high that the blood in our veins was starting to crystalize.

Actually, we just went to a meat-addled buffet, which is what we do in my hometown. But my mom was so sugar-ravaged that she had to steal a piece of fried chicken from my cousin's plate and gnaw off a chunk, just to have the strength to crawl to the buffet to fetch her own meat.

On a side note, we had two buffet meals while in my hometown, and I had a moment that made me realize I've lived away from my hometown for a long time. While milling around the food troughs with the locals I kept thinking, "Damn. People here sure talk funny. And why does that Mennonite guy have a Bluetooth?"

Friday night, we drove through a fierce blowing snowstorm to get to my hometown. The snow drifts into small hills on the plains, and at 11 PM, when most people are sleeping and the snow's undisturbed, it's beautiful. But when it suddenly jumps to 55 degrees the next day, it turns to a pit of mud. Which is too bad. My dad's dingo, Chiggar, spent Friday night eating red plastic Valentine hearts covered with red glitter. I was hoping to awaken Saturday morning to glittery Chiggar turds dotting the beautiful white snow. Alas, he opted to deposit several loads of red glittery puke around the house instead.

Clara Jane got a tricked-out tricycle.

My dad got a surrey with the fringe on top.

He busted into show tunes from "Oklahoma" right after I took this picture. Really.

I got more sock yarn, which is exactly what I needed.

The loveliness was procured at the delightful Hillcreek Yarn Shoppe in the equally lovely and delightful Columbia, Missouri. If you're in the area, or close enough to make a road trip, I highly recommend it. Great, great, wonderful yarn shop. Spinning and weaving, even.

Did I mention that we got a signed contract on The House We Love? Just making sure you hadn't forgotten.

I also got an interesting comment on my blog, which I deleted because I knew that the commenter would possibly get ripped to shreds. Apparently, a reader took offense to my "Devil Baby" comment. She asked what possessed me to call my child such a thing. The urge to say, "Why, the devil possessed me, of course!" was damn near overwhelming, and I'm proud of myself for refraining. She went on to say that children are a gift from God, that I was inviting the devil into her life, and that she'd pray for God to protect my child from my ignorance.

Okay.

I normally don't talk about religion or politics on my blog. There are plenty of places on the web who do a much better job of it than I do. But I do want to address this.

My God does not operate on superstition. My God is wise enough, benevolent enough, loving enough, and forgiving enough to know that the "Devil Baby" silliness isn't real evil. My God is too busy dealing with real evil in the lives of children to bother with silliness.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something for the children of genocide in Darfur.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something for the children who are orphaned or dying of extreme povery.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something for the girls in Cambodia who are sold into the sex trade.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something for the children in Iraq who have lost everything to this goddamn war.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something for the children who are still suffering from the ravages of Hurricane Katrina.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something about the American kids who don't get enough to eat.

My God is more interested in getting his believers to pay attention and do something for the children in Uganda who are stolen from their families and brainwashed into being warriors. In our country, we're mesmerized by a news story about two boys who were kidnapped. And rightfully so. But imagine living in a country where over 30,000 children have been abducted and put to work in a war. Want to talk about the devil at work in the lives of children? There it is, right there.

I know children are a gift from God. As a woman who was told that I wouldn't be able to get pregnant, probably not even with fertility drugs, but did, I know what a gift from God feels like. I also know what a gift of modern medical science, ancient medical science (acupuncture), prayer, hope, knowledge of my body and how it functions feel like. So, instead of getting worked up about a silly little blog and a child who is loved, treasured, wanted, pampered, disciplined, and cherished, perhaps that energy would be best spent on working to erradicate some of the very real evil at work on many of the children of the world.

Did I mention the house? I did? Did I mention it has a crescent moon and star in the masonry work on the chimney? You might want to pray for our mortal souls, living under that Pagan symbol on our fireplace.

Now, who wants to go for a sweet surrey ride with Bubba?