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May 29, 2007
Packing Heat
Last week while browsing the library in a rather foul mood, I swore that I will never, ever read any book that utilizes a pun in the title, just on the principle that it's stupid and cliched. And yet, that doesn't stop me from using bad puns for blog titles. I'm not really packing heat,literally or figuratively. I'm just packing, and it's hot.
See why it's a good idea to not read crap with puns in the title? It's a huge indicator that bad writing will follow.
I made it home from my hometown late Sunday night, once again loving the delays that come with train travel despite the whining of everyone else.
Clara Jane has been doing fine at my parents' house, despite clinging to me all weekend.I'm sure her clinginess had everything to do with the recent uprooting,and absolutely nothing to do with Saturday night's lesson in pet amputation.
You might recall a post I recently made regarding my grandparents' cats, who have no tails. It's not pretty, especially in the case of Elmer #2:
Don't worry, he does have a head. It's not pretty, either.
He's sweet, I'll give him that. He's had a rough life, so it makes sense that he looks like holy hell. Elmer #2 is somewhere between 12-17 years old. The neighbor ran over Elmer #2's mother when he was an kitten. His father, Elmer #1, stowed away in my grandparents' RV during a camping trip to the Truman Lake. Despite having Elmer #1 for several years, my grandparents didn't recognize this as being their cat, and therefore booted him from the RV. It wasn't until they got home and said, "Hmmm ... have you seen Elmer?" that they realized what had happened.
I didn't take a photo of Elmer #2's neck. He recently tussled with a bobcat. The results? Really not pretty.
A few years ago, Elmer #2 got into a tussle with another animal - a regular occurance, even though he never learned how to fight and routinely gets his ass kicked. In this tussle, he received a tail injury that led to an infection that led to amputation.
On Saturday night, my granny invited us to dinner. I can't remember the last time Granny cooked dinner for me. I do know that as of this past weekend, B. and I have been together for nine years, and in that time Granny has never cooked for us.
Friday morning I texted The Cuz to tell her where we'd be having lunch. She texted me back to inform me that she was preparing to eat fried chicken at Granny's.
Was I invited? Uh, no. So I whined and pissed and moaned until I guilted my 81-year-old grandmother into making dinner for me on Saturday night.
After dinner, we were outside, where Elmer (the #2 is somewhat pointless, since #1 made his trip to the lake in 1995.) attached himself to Clara Jane. Which, incidentally, is how the Elmers got their name. Grandpa Chuck claimed that Elmer #1 stuck to Lady, their morbidly obsese, gravy-eating dog, like glue. Anyway, I pointed out Elmer's lack of a tail to Clara Jane, who went about the business of looking for Elmer's tail:
He, in turn, looked for Clara Jane's missing tail:
Otherwise, the weekend was low-key, which I needed. B. rebuilt the house from the bottom up while we were gone. Yesterday, he continued while I packed. And packed. And packed and packed and sweated and packed.
Today, I went in search of more cheap furniture. Scored at two thrift stores: an $11 solid wood coffee table and a $5 antique floor lamp. I also made my first-ever trip to Old Time Pottery. I've already made this request of my spouse and mother, and now I'm going to make it to all of you. I want you to make me a solemn vow that, if I ever say that I'm considering a trip to Old Time Pottery, you will slap me hard across my face.
Tonight? I pack some more. Seventeen days to finish it all.
Posted by Robin at May 29, 2007 03:58 PM
Comments
The picture of your granny's cooking made me weep. It was that beautiful looking.
I pray to never move again. The packing and unpacking blows goats and I'm the one stuck doing it all while Mr I'd-Like-To-Help-But-I'm-All-Paralyzed-And-Stuff just sits there.
But he does cheer me on when I get a box packed or unpacked. I'll give him that much.
Posted by: Dixie at May 29, 2007 04:52 PM
Old Time Pottery? OK, I'll keep my slap hand ready...
Posted by: Exena at May 29, 2007 07:51 PM
>> I ever say that I'm considering a trip to Old Time Pottery, you will slap me hard across my
>> face.
Olde Time Pottery? Yes indeed, about once a year I come across the OTP ad in the paper and think, "y'know, I should give that place another chance..." Then my husband reminds me that I once made a vow like yours, and gets the old slap-hand ready....
:-)
Counting down! 17 days? Woo!
Posted by: barbara at May 29, 2007 08:27 PM
So they didn't go back to the lake for Elmer #1?
Posted by: Kathie at May 29, 2007 10:04 PM
*snort* Slap hand. I'm going to work that into my everyday vocabulary.
Kathie, they did go back and look for him, as did most of the people they know. No luck, though.
Posted by: Robin at May 29, 2007 10:33 PM
*blech* packing *blech*
If you need loading/unloading help, I'll give you the name of the company we've used twice. They're speedy, super-careful, and the owner has tattoos and ear-spacer things. Hmmm...sorry for taking up comment space with free advertising.
Anyway, the moving process sucks. I hurt all over.
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