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July 25, 2007
Stuff I've Learned
I know, this is damn near the same as those lame-ass posts with dots I often make when I don't have anything terribly interesting happening in my life. Bear with me. Life is good and calm, and it's quiet enough that I can actually hear my brain when it wants to teach me stuff.
I've learned that it's a waste to spend $12 for a yoga class for my kid. Why? Because I wind up doing all the yoga, all while cajoling Clara Jane to c'mon, please be a downward-facing dog instead of standing there, interrupting the yoga teacher with the details of this morning's episode of "Curious George". The after-effects? All the sore muscles of yoga with none of the Zen benefits. Screw that. From now on, I pay $12/class to yoga teachers who don't invite pants-poopers into the classroom.
I've learned that what Clara Jane lacks in yoga ability, she makes up for in descriptive talents. For example: "Murphy throwed-ed up. She went [insert dog-vomit noises here]. It was orange and looked like a cupcake." I've also learned that there is something that can suppress my insatiable cupcake appetite.
Speaking of dog problems, did you know that Scott Wolf from "Party of Five" has a Maltese with fleas? I learned that yesterday. He sought advice from my pal Jen the Groomer. I don't know if the Maltese pukes orange cupcakes, though.
I've learned that, just because my dad complain on the length of our grass, that doesn't mean he's willing to go to the garage, get the mower, and cut it himself.
I learned that, when the local Punkymoms group has a playdate at the same time and location as a local affluent suburban moms group, it's the punkymoms and their children who are better behaved. I'm sure this doesn't surprise a lot of you. Our tattoos were better, too.
I've learned that I really miss Trader Joe's. I went there today for the first time since the move, and I honestly wanted one of everything.
I've learned that "The Grapes of Wrath" might possibly be my favorite book of all time and I was an idiot for letting it intimidate me for all these years. Ma Joad is my new hero. I've also learned that it's scary and sad how applicable the novel is to what's going on in our world these days.
I've learned that my husband can walk down the street while reading the new Harry Potter book. I just looked out the window and saw it with my own two eyes.
I've learned that no matter how much B. and Clara Jane claimed the need for a xylophone in this house, they were mistaken.
I've learned that I'm quite smart these days.
Posted by Robin at July 25, 2007 04:09 PM
Comments
I'm afraid that Clara Jane's gonna have to work harder on her descriptions. She hasn't damped my cupcake love one iota. If I could only get that cupcake monkey off my back.
Posted by: Dixie at July 25, 2007 05:24 PM
Yoga wasn't created for kids, it was created because of them! Ohmmmm
Posted by: Robin2 at July 25, 2007 06:03 PM
another reason you need to get on a plane and come to California, so I can take you to the Steinbeck Museum.
Posted by: m at July 25, 2007 07:45 PM
Okay I may have to read that book now. Since I'm done with Harry Potter, I need something. When are you going to do any more jellys? I'm out.
Posted by: Cassie at July 26, 2007 09:53 AM
a)Not to be an enabler, but you know there's a cupcake store in the CWE now, right?
b)I think the only folks surprised by which kids were more well behaved would be the moms from the other group.
c)B can walk and read? I'm pretty sure that would end with me in traction if I tried it!
d)I'm with them, who doesn't need a xylophone? Really!
Posted by: Amy in StL at July 26, 2007 09:59 AM
Thats funny that you are reading The Grapes of Wrath. I started it, only a about 100 pages in, but I'm loving it.
Posted by: Tiffany at July 26, 2007 03:54 PM
I've learned that I've missed the fool out of you. You make "nothing going on in your life" sound so cool.
Marybeth
Posted by: Marybeth at July 26, 2007 05:42 PM
B and I have something in common! I can also walk down the street and read. I'm pretty sure they closed off a section of a street at the university I used to go to because of this habit of mine which included walking across the street while reading.
Posted by: Katya at July 26, 2007 08:43 PM
Apparentally one of the Chesterfield moms (ugh, it even sounds bland) complained about my kid hitting her little darling to Stacey in the boutique side. Stacey came over later and thanked little Eddie, because the mom let her brats pull toys out of their packaging and strew them around the store.
Nyah, nyah, nyah, the owner likes me and hates you, so stay in Gymboree where you belong nyah nyah nyah.
/rant
Posted by: Beqi at July 30, 2007 10:43 AM
